Take something beautiful. A glowing woman swollen with life ...
... the subsequent miracle of birth ...
Now, taint it all with the ever so quaint, recently made popular expression, 'push present'. Just brings a tear to your eye, don't it? A push present, for those of you with inquiring minds (and who haven't already figured this one out for yourselves), is a prezzie that one parent gives the other for birthing the new addition to their family. So, that would be you husbands, boyfriends and significant others of either gender. Now, me being a tad on the dédaigneuse side, I find the expression cringe-worthy. Frankly, I prefer the alternate expression, 'baby bauble'. Besides feeding into my love of alliterations, it clearly spells out what the non-baby-pushing-out parent should be shopping for (which, after popping out three people myself, is the LEAST you should receive by way of thanks, if you ask me!).
... the subsequent miracle of birth ...
... culminating in the arrival of a beautiful newborn.
Now, taint it all with the ever so quaint, recently made popular expression, 'push present'. Just brings a tear to your eye, don't it? A push present, for those of you with inquiring minds (and who haven't already figured this one out for yourselves), is a prezzie that one parent gives the other for birthing the new addition to their family. So, that would be you husbands, boyfriends and significant others of either gender. Now, me being a tad on the dédaigneuse side, I find the expression cringe-worthy. Frankly, I prefer the alternate expression, 'baby bauble'. Besides feeding into my love of alliterations, it clearly spells out what the non-baby-pushing-out parent should be shopping for (which, after popping out three people myself, is the LEAST you should receive by way of thanks, if you ask me!).
There are sites dedicated to the browsing and purchasing of these gifts - Gifts.com have a large assortment and even the parental bible, Parents.com are part of the revolution, offering the baubles no woman would turn down but also smashing ideas like spa treatments and trips! It's almost enough to make me want another baby ... I said ALMOST!
So, welcome to the world of 'push presents', where actress Jessica Alba has requested a $54,000 gold and diamond Frank Muller watch for the upcoming birth of her second child, stylist Rachel Zoe received a 10-carat (10!) diamond ring and Marc-Anthony gifted J-Lo with a pair of $2.5 million earrings. (Sure, you're saying, but she had twins! Well, you'd be wrong because he also gave her a $300,000 canary diamond ring! Yowsah!)
What did I get? *snicker* Let's see ... that would be nothing for the births of Kevin and Jordan. When Julia came along, I turned to her father and demanded flowers. I reminded him that this was my third (and last) ride on the delivery table merry-go-round. I reminded him that he had always wanted a daughter and now had one. I reminded him that every other woman on the floor had flowers and by gawd, I was not leaving the hospital until I had MY freakin' bouquet. He came through and in the 14 years we were together, that marked the second (and last) time he ever brought me flowers. But that's a whole other posting for a whole other day! So ... what did YOU get?
9 comments:
'PUSH presents'...........A VULGAR TERM! and like yourself...don't recall any...flower's on the other hand bring up skeptical emotions cause I had ton's of them....the last ones I recall..beautiful bouquet on my birthday...yep, the night he left me 24 yrs ago........flower's don't trust em! I did however have a banner hanging outside my house after my 3rd.......but is that a present????
No, I'm thinking not!
Actually I did get flowers after both girls but I think they were from my parents!!!!!
You are owed, Sandy! Demand interest too! :)
don't like the term "push present", it is vulgar and tactless....flowers should be given from the heart and because you want to, not because someone asks you for them...
Vulgar and tackless, yes!
Let's see...for the first born son....NOTHING, hhmmm for the middle child...NOTHING, for the long-awaited daughter..., yup you guessed it NOTHING!!!
Either we weren't demanding enough or else we were simply born in the wrong generation! :/
Not surprisingly I kind of like the term. It's short, concise and rolls off the tongue. Very hip and twitter friendly. Much better than the alternative, Placenta Disposal Present. If anything PP needs a little marketing help. Tie it to a diamond giving occasion and you've got a winner. Not to mention a new greeting card category. Je me souviens when I lived in la belle province the Quebec Governement were ahead of the curve on this, except they called it a baby bonus.
A diamond would make a lovely 'baby bonus'. Calling it a 'push present' is just crass. I'm just saying.
Post a Comment